No matter what my research had hinted at, I had resolutely declared this was PMR. PMR is primarily inflammation in the muscles surrounding joints. Its thought that after a few years, it goes away. Not only are there actual test results and markers (thus, something to measure and evaluate) but PMR has an end.
Fibro, on the other hand is willy-nilly. There are no tests, in fact, it's an exclusionary diagnoses. When there is nothing else wrong with you, other than wide-spread debilitating pain and fatigue, it's Fibro. My Mother had always thought this was a "catch all" diagnosis. It would make me cringe because on some level, she was right. Now seeing her daughter being diagnosed with it, I guess she now sees that a "catch all" willy-nilly thing, it may be, but it's a real syndrome, none the less.
It's not that I didn't see this coming; it's not that the symptoms changed or I'm in more pain because of the diagnosis (well, I am actually, at the moment); its because the outlook has changed. PMR has and end, but not Fibro. Yes, sure, I'm reading all about diet and exercise and healthy ideas that can reduce if not eliminate most of the pain, but it's all a little hard to digest.
My Rheumatologist recommended I take up a Vegan diet. No offense to Vegans,but no, thank you. While I'm not opposed to eating healthier with more veggies and less Hamburger Helper, I'm not quite understanding why diet = less pain.
Supposedly, long term stress or trauma is believed to be the cause of the onset of Fibro. That I can attest to. There was a long season of stress before this began and it was followed by an even longer, worse season. I'm still learning all the theories but one thing I know is this: it wasn't a SmashBurger than has me hardly functioning this weekend. (I know because I didn't even EAT a SmashBurger, or any other burger, last week) This last week was crazy busy. My brain interprets busy = stress. Whether or not it is actually stressful. It wasn't. This last week my job and my personal life did a line dance that left me changing parters constantly with little downtime or quiet time for myself. And hormonal activities are at play which is also part of the perfect storm for a pain flare. (Note to self: avoid visiting a new church while in a pain flare. The hand shaking and shoulder patting are not helpful)
Deciding last weekend that I wanted to fit into my favorite jeans more comfortably, I have eaten very healthy this week. Low cal, low fat, no SmashBurgers. I'm sure there are Fibro-Gurus out there than can effectively explain this to me, but I'm not seeing the correlation between veggies and pain-freeness.
I picked up FibroWHYalgia by Sue Ingebreston for some insight from someone who has been on this road a lot longer than I have. I've followed Ms. Ingebreston for about 2 years on Twitter and I knew that, at the very least, she would make me laugh. I'm not disappointed. I'm only a quarter of the way through the book. There haven't been any information breakthroughs, yet, but it's a fun book and it improves my mood to read it. That's therapy by its own right.
So, BLOGging. Isn't that what you're supposed to do when diagnosed with a chronic illness? I don't know. I'm trying to get my thoughts out. Maybe get this journey down somewhere to compare the beginning to the end. So this is been coming for a while, but I feel like I'm back at the beginning so I'm starting here. Dr. also "recommends" :) that I get my Tai Chi routine back....in order......so that's next on my agenda, after feeling sorry for myself, after complaining about another day of pain, and another go at BLOGging. Maybe Ms. Ingebreston will have something to say that is just what I need to inspire me to take another step forward.
