Good, Better, Best

I have been struggling with the ideas of God's "perfect will" vs God's "permissive will". I am defining those terms as God best plan for me vs what is not necessarily against His will, yet is not ultimately what He would have me do. I'm not even sure that's a good definition.
It's hard knowing what His will is when I have desires of my own. Does it seem to be God's will because that is in line with my own desires? Let's stop talking hypothetical so this makes more sense:
I took a part time job. It's 3 hours a day and seems to be the perfect thing for any Mom who wants the best of both worlds. But that's the trouble: I don't want both worlds. I want ONE world. Being able to be home and be a full-time homemaker. Three years ago, I was burned out on cooking, cleaning, and organizing. Six months ago, I would have given anything to have it back! And now here I am with that available to me, and what do I do? Go back to work.

If it was a matter of simply weighing the pros and cons, it would be easy. Although the lists would probably be equal in size and it would just be a matter of what I wanted most. But that's not the weight of it. I ONLY want to do God's plan! Because I know that while whatever I decide might be a "good" thing, His plan will be the BEST thing. I know that while there will be good things that come with a decision on my own, I risk missing immeasurable blessings.
Quite honestly I put myself in this quandary. I had a clear sense of direction from Him a month ago. I wasn't looking for this job when it was offered to me. Sometimes people will call that a "God thing". I didn't feel that this time. I've never been excited about it or thought it necessarily felt right.

Are these "feelings" an indication of God's will? Or is it simply my human emotions of what *I* want to do?

Every time I write this out, because this is not the first, it seems very clear to me. I have written emails to those who's prayers I covet and advice I treasure. It seems clear to me that if, at one point I had a very clear indication from God, and I took a side road, I should just get off the frontage road and get back on the highway. The trouble is I have 100 reasons why I shouldn't. All are my reasoning not necessarily God's.

So my prayer is this: Yes, God, I know I don't deserve a direct answer from you when You already were clear with me, once. No, I don't deserve for you to create an easy way out of this. But because I am seeking, God, because I am still learning, because I want only Your perfect will in all parts of my life, please have mercy on me and, once more, fix this for me so I once again have a clear sense of direction. Or tell me to stay put, and I will do that.

There is much good that can come from either decision. But I don't want what's good. I don't even want which decision is better. I want God's BEST.